This Pain is hard

Sitting here right below this dark night sky
I am gonna writing something today what i always deny
I learned my way from her when it was too late for me
It just felt like i was an option to her when she needed me
I kept on saying and expressing my love for her
But all i got was pain and loneliness in return
I cried every night just because i knew i was not the one for her
I was sad and broken because someone else was winning her attention
I tried really hard and gave up whatever i could
But all she said was we are just friend and i need to accept it too
I smiled at her face and she believed that moment of me
It was just her who didn't realise what she was meant for me true
Everyone kept on saying me to walk away for a while
I tried being hard i tried being harah but at the end it was heart which tore me apart
I smiled looking at her while we exchanged our paths
But she never knew i was in a war between my brain and heart
I kept surviving on a hope that one day she would find real me out
I just survived on a hope that someday she would know all of me about
It scared me more with every passing day
It broke me within as i was just left all alone
I was looking for her because i needed someone bold like her
I needed her by ny side just because i was left abandoned
With every day and night paasing by this loneliness in me killed me by
I just looked at those pics of her and my dad
I just wished i better end instead holding on this pain too hard.

-Nitish

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